Wednesday, October 11, 2006

FANTASY NFL: Why T.O. Should Seek Jesus

This dude kills me every year in some capacity.

He absolutely KILLED me in the 2003 playoffs (I'm a big Giants fan). From Wikipedia:

The team's success was hampered by (Terrell) Owens' feuds with Garcia and 49ers head coach Steve Mariucci. Those feuds were temporarily put aside during the 2002 season when the 49ers surged to win the NFC Western division and earned a home playoff date against the New York Giants. In that game the 49ers produced the second-greatest comeback in NFL playoff history by coming back from a 24 point deficit (14-38) and winning 39-38 behind notable performances from Garcia and Owens in particular. Although the team lost its subsequent game to the eventual Super Bowl Champion Tampa Bay Buccaneers, the season had been successful.

Well that's just great. To top it off he was on my fantasy team that year, so I effectively rooted for this bastard all year only to watch him rip my heart out. Anyway, we all know how Philly turned out and look what's developing in Dallas. Vegas took this bet of the books a very long time ago.

Having him on your fantasy team is as horrifc as watching your puppy get hit in the face with a shovel.

I was camping in the gorgeous Assateague Island during hurricane Ernesto. I have the pictures to prove it. So I autodrafted Clinton Portis, Fred Taylor, Ahman Green, Adam Vinitieri, Wayne Gretzky, Antonio Gates (that whole Phillip Rivers thing) and Alfred Hitchcock. Another story for another time.

What's important now is the T.O. situation because he's throwing it up my poop chute--yet again--AND I HAVE TO TAKE IT. I autodrafted a complete jerk again. I hate watching him on Sunday because I have to hear about how much he sucks.

No one wants to deal with him. He's still the kid on the playground who picks on everyone to get attention for himeself. I don't want to deal with that anymore. I have to though, because if you screw up either of your first two round draft picks, you are either a) screwed or b) need to get really creative to win your league. There is a plan c, but would you really drop The Prince of Darkness?

If I get lucky though and T.O. seeks Jesus, I could win my league. I really hate this epic war of good and evil.

My advice: trade for T.O. You'll get him cheap and when he hauls in 3 TD passes week 17 (when Bill Parcells concedes to him because the playoffs are the line), you'll win a league championship.

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